Welcome back everyone. This week we got to see Operation: Shut Up about Russia escalate even more. The theater of operations has increased to three fronts by adding Afghanistan and North Korea. Some people, including yours truly, are beginning to wonder if the goal is to start World War III.
The week began with Senator Majority Leader Mitch McConnell unfurling his “Mission Accomplished” banner with Neil Gorsuch being sworn into the Supreme Court. I always find the phrase “sworn in” to be odd for politicians. The swearing usually happens after they take office.
Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, took some time to travel to Russia. It turned out that he would have been more productive if he had taken a nap. Due to the bombing of an empty Syrian airfield, Russia is angry that Mr. Trump acted on “fake news.” After all, they had drones in the air watching the Syrians as they did what they did not do.
White House Press Secretary, Sean Spicer, made the case for going after Assad by noting that not even Hitler gassed his own people. According to him, the German Jews only took extended vacations to “Holocaust Centers” and received free complimentary showers. It seems that now the Republican administration is using the Godwin rule for making policy.
Opponents of the Republican administration have been claiming that the attack on Syria is a diversion to make us think there isn’t any real shenanigans between Trump and Putin. Why else would the attack do so little damage to that airfield? Of course, all of this is wishful thinking. The truth is that in addition to having small hands, Mr. Trump fires blanks.
In Afghanistan, the military decided to try the nuke them from orbit strategy against ISIS. They dropped a bomb, commonly known as the Mother Of All Bombs, on a set of tunnels. Initial reports state that 36 ISIS fighters were killed (a rumor puts the death toll at 90). From a business perspective, that was not a very good return on investment. I guess that is why Mr. Trump was no stranger to bankruptcy court.
A number of ships are heading towards North Korea which is making China, Russia, and especially South Korea nervous. North Korea tried to make a show of strength by failing to fire a rocket. Unfortunately, Kim Jong-un is failing to realize that our leader is just as bat guano crazy as he. The situation is tense. So tense, that Mr. Trump spent the entire weekend Mar-a-lago playing golf.
Some things about the Trump/Russia investigation have managed to come out. First, the probe is expanding to include allegations of improper unmasking. Many alt-right supporters cheered this decision. Not only will they be able to brush the controversy under the rug, they can use it to attack Obama. Now, all they have to do it to get people to pay attention to who did the unmasking and not why the person was unmasked.
Stay tuned next week as the Pentagon tries to recruit United Airlines in the fight against ISIS.